What's up, Stonedvet Army!
This week I'm talking about how to work out your emotional strength.
You see, a lot of times we're really good at certain emotions, but we suck at others.
It's like this...
Most people practice emotions like fear, anger, anxiety, humiliation, frustration, disappointment. depressed, hurt, guilt, and boredom.
And guess what, because we practice them, we're really fucking good at experiencing those emotions!
However, most people rarely practice more positive emotions such as playful, interested, proud, powerful, optimistic, thankful, loving, or successful.
Again, guess what... Because we don't practice positive emotions...
... you guessed it, WE SUCK AT THEM!
I'm not pointing any fingers or calling anyone out, but if the shoe fits...
So the question becomes, how do I get better at the more positive mental states?
Luckily for you, in my quest I learned a drill from Dr. David Snyder that teaches not only how to better be in control of your mental state, but how to choose it.
If that sounds exciting, then buckle up because we're going to jump into it.
Let's get started...
First I want you to find a chair that you can sit in and have a minute to yourself undisturbed.
Now that you're seated in a chair and are ready to focus, all you need to do is:
1. Pick a mental state: Example. Happy
2. Pick the opposite state. Example, Angry
3. Start at a Zero point
4. Pick and amplify the first feeling
5. Calibrate, notice how far you can go into that state take 30 seconds to allow yourself to feel that emotion, really go into it.
6. Break the state, and come back to the neutral position you started from.
7. Go into the opposite state that you chose.
8. Calibrate how far you can go. Notice how long it takes you to feel that emotion.
9. Bring yourself back to a neutral state.
10. Write down your results.
What did you notice?
If you're like most people, you probably noticed that the negative emotion was easier to get into, it came on stronger, and you could go farther.
Am I right, did you experience this too?
Comment below, let me know.
Take a minute or two each day to stop what you're doing, and start practice this exercise with a variety of emotions and mental states each day.
With these techniques you will quickly train yourself how to pull yourself from ANY emotion that is not currently serving you.
It's like in the Military when you drill and drill so that when you're in battle, when it counts the most, you don't have to even think.
Now for a bit more truth.
If you would like to be able to just jump in and out of emotional states at will, you MUST learn to practice.
DRILL WITH THESE STATES!
The next thing people say to me when I tell them about this exercise is that they don't know what states to practice.
I get it, many people haven't developed a robust emotional vocabulary, so if you thought about making that excuse, I am bestowing upon you a list of ideas for emotional states that you can work.
- Attractiveness vs. Repulsive
- In Control vs. Out of Control
- Sincerity vs. Insincerity
- Anger vs. Indifference
- Trust vs. Distrust
- Certainty vs. Uncertainty
- Joy vs. Sadness
- Confident vs. Unconfident
- Relaxed vs. Stressed
- Excited vs. Bored
- Fascination vs. Confusion
- Clairity vs. Confusion
- Authority vs. Subservience
- Powerful vs. Powerless
- Conviction vs. Disbelief
- Inspired vs. Overwhelmed
- Valued vs. Embarrassed
- Optimistic vs. Nervous
When you loose control of your emotions, the other person wins.
I want to see everyone succeed. I want to be surrounded by winners. Please don't let weak emotional strength stand between you and the best version of you.
The more you drill the better your skills.
Remember, just like the military, practice now for when you're in the heat of the moment later.
I will leave you with this.
Time is going to keep on ticking by whether you do it, or not.
Would you rather look back in 5 years and thank yourself for making a decision to practice these skills today?
Look back in 5 years and wishing you had taken action.
It's your call.
Comment below let me know what choice you've made.